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Multi-tasking His Way To Seduction

DR. SHRINK paired his idea of romance with psychoanalysis from the very first, even on the dating site where we met.  But when we moved to phone conversation, he did not analyze my early childhood, as he had in our email exchanges. And he didn’t try to build me up with baseless flattery.

Instead, he described his attempts to renovate his house in order to rid it of snakes, field mice, spiders, and other creatures that make their way into rural homes. The mailman, he said, delivers directly to his door because the mailbox is often snake-enwrapped. Dr. Shrink is fond of the snake pair, and supports their tender couplings in whatever venue they choose.  Dr. Shrink, you will recall, is a specialist in Relationships.  

 snake and mouse

On the basis of agreeable discussion via email, the Doc has decided that I might make a good date. Does he invite me to dinner or a movie? No, he has asked me to accompany him to a lecture entitled, “Stress Response and Patterns of Social Regulation.” Does he not know the way to a Starbucks? At first I thought he was pulling my leg, but it turns out he is really capable of envisioning this experience — sitting shoulder to shoulder in an auditorium full of scholarly dweebs — as the jump-start of a romantic relationship. 


This is the least romantic first-date invitation I’ve ever had, so astonishingly terrible that I had to say yes. I’m curious about how Dr. Shrink will behave. Perhaps he will rise from his seat and shout at the lecturer, “Madame, ignoring phenomenological errors in the measurement of the human stress response has destroyed the credibility of your hypothesis!” Or maybe he’ll just sit quietly and take notes. We’ll see.

The worst that can happen is that I’ll learn something about social regulation of the stress response. I’ll go away with way more than I would from, say, watching Sharon Stone in “Basic Instinct Two.”  Dr. Shrink, of course, will have both research material for his next book and a sense of romantic accomplishment.  Dr. Shrink has introduced the new formule seduisante.

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'Multi-tasking His Way To Seduction' have 9 comments

  1. December 24, 2011 @ 5:50 pm Sienna

    Thanks so much for your perceptive comment, Diane. I wasn’t able to continue with this man because I felt more a subject of analysis than a friend or companion. Your suggestion that a clinician should not confuse the personal and the professional certainly resonated for me!

  2. December 24, 2011 @ 10:13 am Diane

    What this tells me about him is that he is quite insecure except when it comes to his profession. The only way he knows how to deal with you is to put you into that context somehow. I am also a therapist but it is a tiring job. I wouldn’t want to construe a date as a potential patient or colleague.

  3. October 22, 2011 @ 2:32 pm Carrie

    Are you still dating this guy?

  4. May 25, 2011 @ 8:17 pm Sienna

    Thanks for your comment, PartyGirl. In fact, this relationship didn’t go anywhere. Dr. Shrink was a man I dated because I wasn’t tied up with anyone else at the time, but that has changed.

  5. May 21, 2011 @ 6:47 am Party Girl

    I hope this doesn’t go anywhere. Shrinks make lousy partners. They analyze you continuously because they can’t help it. I was in a relationship with a doctor like this for about 2 years and I broke it off because I just couldn’t take it. He was confused, and couldn’t fathom why I was leaving.

  6. April 5, 2011 @ 10:57 am ElizAnn

    This is not dating. This is being used.

  7. March 21, 2010 @ 12:01 pm Katherine

    Why would you go out with such a person? The rest of your stories are nice, not grim like this one. He has a house full of mice and his idea of a date is to include you in his professional development. No way this is better than the Sharon Stone film.

  8. November 9, 2009 @ 5:35 pm Sienna

    Stay tuned, Lily. The doc is full of surprises. Thanks for your comment.

  9. November 9, 2009 @ 11:37 am Lily

    This episode of your D.r Shrink story is really funny. This is a unique and very funny blog! But it has also a lot of good information.

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